Question of the day! Would you forgive and accept a mother who abandoned you when you were a kid?


“My name is Albert. I am a 36-year-old man living and working with an oil servicing company in Lagos, married with two children.

The problem I have at the moment is that my family has been on my neck to forgive my mother who abandoned me and my two younger ones when we were kids and we were raised by our father first, and then our stepmother when he got married later.

I must state here that I have still not found it easy to forgive my mother for leaving us when we needed her most. The fact that she ran away with another man when my dad fell on bad times is still fresh in my mind and I had vowed never to recognize her as my mother or to extend any assistance to her.

Our stepmother, quite unlike other women, took over the duties of a mother and we never felt the vacuum created by our biological mother. She never discriminated between us and her children, always making us know that she is our mother, something I will forever be grateful.

Now that woman that abandoned us wants to creep back into our lives but I still cannot accept her as my mother. The only reason she is trying to seek our forgiveness is because we are doing well in life.

My younger brother is an aeronautical engineer based in the United States while my only sister and her husband live in the UK and they are doing very well.

Now our mother has been begging us to accept her back, saying she regrets her actions. My sister who is the soft one amongst us, has been on our necks to accept her apologies.

Even our stepmother has been very angry with me, even vowing to stop talking to me or even visit me if I refuse to accept my mother’s apologies, reasoning that she has realised her mistakes and needs us now that she is getting old.

My wife too has been disturbing me, saying she wants to bond with her mother-in-law and the need for our children to get to know their real grandmother.

But I still cannot bring myself to forgive her and accept her back.

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